Monday, June 29, 2009

Numi's Tag about Home

This is a super delayed tag from Numi. In fact, I only remembered it when I checked Livi's blog a few minutes ago. So am taking my cue from Livi and I am going to list down things we always have at home.

1. Chicken and soup- 2 food groups the kids are SURE to eat.
2. Drinking water- we don't have soft drinks at home so this is a must.
3. Cleaning implements- I am obsessed with this. I know, this is not healthy.
4. Spices- the best thing to have when you are stuck in a rut as to what to cook.
5. Cigarettes- these are always in the Master's bedroom or in my bag. I have a few vices, I know.
6. Alcohol and hand sanitizer- speaks for itself.
7. Toys and all things kid-related- a must.
8. Rice- this probably should have been listed as # 2 but it just came to mind now.

pretty decent list, huh?

Decisions, Decisions

Funny how the universe works. Since last year, I've been trying to be conscious of the messages of the universe. I've been trying to learn the lesson lest the test be given again. I though, work-wise, I had gotten it. Lately though, I am thinking I probably haven't. So I've come to a decision. A major one for me. I think I'm going to cut back on work hours, try to come up with a business instead of going to an office, and spend more time at home, with the kids, and the hubby, an myself. At least for a while. This was a tough decision to come to. Anyone who knows me well would understand. But I am thinking that maybe this is the way to go for now. Maybe the reason I've been encountering only roadblocks is because I chose the wrong road. I am nt sure how this will play out. It's different from any course I've ever considered. But I am hoping for new, better, good changes. So I'm struggling to the finish line (for this period of my life anyway), counting the minutes and the seconds before I am "free". Wish me luck all!

Friday, June 12, 2009

We've Come a Long Way

At least this result is better than the last quiz!

Both of You Wear the Pants

You and your guy seem to have stuck the perfect power balance.

It's not that you don't disagree - it's just that you've learned how to compromise well.

You're both mature enough to know that you can't always get your way...

And usually, you're both adult enough to reach an agreement - even if that sometimes means giving in a little.

I'm in Trouble

You Are 36% Likely to Survive Another Great Depression

Your habits are pretty on par with the average person.

Unfortunately, this means your chances aren't good in another Great Depression.

Start saving your money now. Living in debt isn't doing you any favors.

Also figure out how to live a little more cheaply. Every little bit you can trim will help.

Darn it! And I thought I was doing so well!

Rain or Snow?

You Are Rain

You are dark and dramatic. You tend to be a bit over the top.

You have strong emotions and they can change quickly. You are tempestuous.

You are wild and unpredictable. You tend to overwhelm and surprise people.

While you are aggressive, you are also a homebody. You don't really care for physical activities.

I like both...but this result is interesting.

Running on Fumes

I've been hesitant about writing a work-related post of late because I don't want to appear like the whinny, ungrateful type. But I think I am fast-approaching the tip of my patience iceberg.
I've said many times that I am up for the challenge of an operations position. It's been something I've always wanted to do, to get some experience in, to learn from. But I think the saying "be careful what you wish for" could not be more apt to my situation right now.
My account is a production account. When I first heard that I thought, OK, numbers. But I never dreamed it would be the white collar equivalent to a blue collar job. I can count the weeks since March when I didn't render more than 1 hour overtime. I don't mind but almost every week for almost 4 months now? I think it's too much. I rarely get to see my kids because I get home super tired and wake up late, just in time to go to work. Half of the weekend is spent recovering from the exhausting week. I've tried to comfort myself by saying that's the way it is with an operations start-up account, but almost everyone I've asked has said this is abnormal and too much. I am stretched. And even if it isn't because of disillusionment, lack of appreciation, being maligned, it is still exhausting and I am getting fed up.
Will I ever find a job I can love? I don't expect perfection, just a balance of work fulfillment and a personal life. Is that too much to ask for?

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

30 Doesn't Feel Any Different

I've thought about turning 30 for a good 5 years now. As the day fast approached, I found myself constantly torn over the excitement of starting a new decade, hopefully, wiser, and fear over getting old. Somehow, my childhood dreams and fantasies never extended past my 20's. So, I think it's understandable that as my 30th birthday fast approached, I was filled with this feeling of not know what to do, how to react, and what to expect. My friend, Kaye, told me that the 30's is so much better than the 20's. You know more, you've seen more, you have a better idea of who you are and what you want. Great! Except I wasn't sure that I knew more, had seen enough, or that I knew myself and what I wanted. I knew that the beginning of this year marked the beginning of a new journey of self-discovery. But I felt 5 months wasn't enough to have even a glimmer of a sure thought about myself. Suffice it to say, I was scared.

3 days after turning the big 3-0 and...nothing feels different. There are some things I expect and can foresee. I expect that my metabolism will slow down even further (especially since I haven't gotten my exercise regimen back and since I almost always skip breakfast). I foresee that my years to complete my MA and PhD are numbered. I know that I have to get my career on track. I am certain I love my husband and kids above anything (OK, the same amount as God?). That's it. I have to say the expression "Houston, we're in trouble" popped into my head almost immediately after typing these last words. Ha!

Well, at the risk of sounding like Oprah (I am definitely not her although I often wish I were), there are some more things I find I know for sure. I know for sure that I am excited to find out what this decade has in store for me. Excited to get back into shape, to go places at work and outside, to be young and beautiful inside and out, and to be the best wife and mom I can be. It doesn't sound like much but I actually think it's quite a lot. Relief, I tell you. I am not lost after all. I can smile now. Isn't that a great way to start the decade? Happy Birthday to me!!