Thursday, September 18, 2008

5 Things I Said I Would Never Say/Do

(photo courtesy of Corbis)

I saw a post on Happy Healthy Families and it inspired me to think and make a similar list.

What are some of the things I said I would never say or do to my kids? This is a tough subject for me. I never really thought much about what I would once I had kids because I planned to have kids a lot later than I actually did. Of course, my 2 adorable angels are the best gifts and surprises I've ever received. Still....thinking back...this is tough.

So, here goes:

What I told myself I would never say/do to my kids:

1. I told myself I would never raise my voice for any reason other than to be better heard and understood.--- ha! This, I really try to follow. But sometimes, when you're tired, and you still have a million things to do with so little time left in the day, and your 3-year old is running around the living room missing big, painful, breakable things by a hair, and your baby girl is crying her eyes out for you to carry her....this can be forgotten. But a millisecond after I feel so bad and I remember to just take a deep breath and calm down. Of course, the voice raising has been done...

2. I told myself I would never answer a "why" question with a "because." or a "because I said so" or "it just that way."- Sigh. My son would sometimes ask me "Mommy? What's that?", pointing at some innocuous thing. I would tell him what that this was, which would be followed by "for?" (meaning 'for what?'). Of course, I would tell him the use of the harmless object. And then he would proceed to ask me the same question, in the same tone, but referring to the object directly beside the previous object. And this would sometimes go on and on until all objects on the now-offending shelf have been named and defined. So....on the 10th item..I sometimes just say, "that's the way it is." It's cute, yes, and I love his wonderful curiosity but sometimes I give up. Just because.

3. I told myself I would not allow my kids to drink commercial juice. -This didn't stand a chance. At least I have stuck to the 'no soda' rule.

4. I told myself that I would not let the yaya handle my kids more than me. -Unfortunately, this is not a full-time working mom's reality. At least not this working mom. Ok mommy guilt, you can come out now.

5. I told myself I would never be a distant mom. -This one I have followed! I always sit down and talk to my kids, ask them about their activities, play with them, hug and kiss them as often as I can.

There may be other things but these five are the things that come to mind now. Looking at my list I can't help but think, not bad. Maybe I'm not doing so badly after all.


yanka said...

I told myself 1 and 2, too. I was really surprised about 2 --- it's much harder than I thought.

momzeebitz said...

being a mom is indeed a boundless responsibility. at times, we tend to overlook some things because we are too preoccupied with a lot of "to-do's"

simple as it is, having such a list might as well work for me. In fact, I already started with the first entry...

thank you for this post mommy! hope to read a lot more like these!


(hope we can exchange links!)

Gin said...

Nice got me thinking there. I understand the raising your voice part. I'm also guilty with that especially when I really had a bad day at work.

vicki said...

momzeebitz, thanks for dropping by too! I do try not to overlook the little things, the good and the bad. This way, I know what I don't want to do again, and I keep all the sweet memories of my kids as they are growing up.

Gin, chin up! Awareness is the first step? It's really hard to keep cool but try the breathing. It works for me sometimes.

vicki said...

Yanka, I know! But your son is great! Gives me hope that I'm not totally screwing things up. =)

LadyinRed said...


Seems very familiar, especially the voice raising.. Yep, I'm guilty too :p

Hey Vicki, thanks for your comment a few days a go :)

vicki said...

Aaaahhh, we are normal then. hehehe. no problem ladyinred. =)